“Ran three miles today and I feel great!” “When I am stressed I like to go on a good long run and it just makes everything better.” Just ate two donuts..better run four miles.

You know what I say to these statements: oh hell naw. I am sorry but running is miserable. I start off strong jamming out to beyonce and by the end of the second(aka the first) song I am ready for the couch. Don’t get me wrong, I love to exercise. The endorphins are great and the fact that when you exercise you can eat that extra large order of french fries is just an added bonus. Running is not exercise. It is straight torture.

I want to be cool and run a marathon someday but the truth of the matter is that deep down I would rather not.

You know the feeling you get when it is so hot outside and you are trying to run. You are basically swimming through the humidity. You keep telling yourself how great it is for you yet wondering why you feel like s***. In the movies when people run they look so pensive and tough. In real life people look slimy, red, and  unhappy.

I dated a guy once who was really into running. He would run miles daily and ,being the typical girl that I am, I of course told him that I also loved to run. Biggest mistake ever. He asked me to come run with him one day. I put on those tennis shoes and decided today was the day that I was suddenly going to be great at running. After the first hill I faked an ankle injury and made him take me home. Needless to say that relationship did not last and neither did my single day of “loving to run.”

I know there are also fellow fake runners out there and to that I say let’s stand together. We do not have to like to run (power walking does the trick).

As for me I plan on sticking to doing blogilates in my living room. You do not have to wear fancy work out clothes and you can look like an idiot without worrying about other people.

Cheers to that.

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